So, in one month, one week, and one day, I'm leaving for London. To make myself feel better about that terrifying fact, I've come up with my ten favorite things that originated in England, from least to greatest. Here you go.
#10. "Monty Python and the Holy Grail"
#10. "Monty Python and the Holy Grail"
One of the best comedies of all time. It's original, random, offensive, witty, and creative, basically everything a comedy should be. It inspired me to buy and shell two coconuts, which turned into a fun Tent Camp tradition of riding gallantly to the snack bar every day.
Honest truth: The last 2 minutes of this movie are frustrating, disappointing, and unfunny.
#9. "Greensleeves"
"What Child Is This" has always been one of my favorite Christmas songs. The tune is taken from an English classical music piece called "Greensleeves" which was written around 1580 in England.Honest Truth: "Greensleeves" is a love song to a prostitute. Merry Christmas.
#8. Kiera Knightley
So as not to get in trouble with Emily, I'll only mention the fact that Kiera Knightley is in Star Wars Episode I and the Pirates of the Caribbean trilogy. Other than that, I think she's butt ugly and not attractive at all, and I know that thousands of guys agree with me. Really.Honest Truth: I am deeply saddened by the fact that I will never meet Kiera Knightley. And Pirates of the Caribbean 3 sucked. A lot.
#7. The United States of America
Alright, it's a bit of a stretch, but it is true! Our country started out as British colonies, and we eventually broke free and became America. So there you go.Honest Truth: I haven’t heard anything from or about Joe Biden since he was announced as Obama’s running mate. What’s that guy doing?
#6. The Beatles
There's really not much to say here. The Beatles are from England. The Beatles are musical gods. The Beatles came to America. The Beatles defined rock and roll. The Beatles are currently 50% dead.Honest Truth: Paul McCartney is overrated and Ringo Starr is underrated.
#5. James Bond
I love the James Bond movies. They're a bit cheesy and redundant, but you can always expect the same things in each one: awesome music, sweet cars, hot girls, cool gadgets, and freaky villians. I never get tired of them. Every Thanksgiving, Spike TV used to have James Bond marathons, and instead of watching football after dinner, I'd watch 3 or 4 Bond flicks in a row. I'm not sure if I have a favorite Bond actor. Of course Connery made, defined, and perfected the role, giving Moore big shoes to fill, and he actually did a great job. I grew up and was introduced to 007 when he was played Brosnan, so that's naturally who I think of when I hear "James Bond", but Craig did a sweet job reinventing the character in the last two movies, even if "Casino Royale" was the least Bondish movie so far.Honest Truth: The single greatest thing about the Bond movies isn't the Bond Girls. It's Q.
#4. Coldplay
Every time this band puts out a new album, EP, or song, I like them even more. They're so cool. "Parachutes" sounds like U2, which makes sense because Coldplay used to open for U2, and Chris Martin always cites Bono as one of his greatest influences and heroes. "A Rush of Blood to the Head" still reminds me of U2, but it definately sounds like the band is starting to get more comfortable with themselves as they search for their own "sound". "X &Y" sounds like it's from outer space and showed the band getting more experimental. "Viva la Vida" is by far my favorite album by Coldplay because for the first time, they sound like Coldplay. They've got their own distinctive instrumentation, rythym, and style, and it's incredible.Honest Truth: "Viva la Vida" (the song) is not as good as everyone makes it out to be. "Viva la Vida" (the album) is Coldplay's best work so far.
#3. The Lord of the Rings Trilogy
To clarify right off the bat, I'm talking about the books, not the movies. But these books plus The Hobbit are some of my favorites. They're kind of hard to read, but that's because Tolkien put his heart and soul into writing them. He didn't just make new creatures and end there. He gave them histories and even invented written and spoken languages for all of them. He didn't just create a new world. He drew elaborate and consistent maps so we could see Middle Earth. He even wrote several other books, such as The Silmarillion and Unfinished Tales that give us the whole history of Middle Earth and all its characters. And yes, the movies are epic as well.Honest Truth: Saruman taking over the Shire at the end of Return of the King is just stupid.
#2. The Harry Potter series
Yes, I just put Harry above Frodo. Sue me. Like Tolkien, J.K. Rowling created a magical universe from scratch and set it right next to the real world. She wrote a 7 part story of a teenage wizard and made a school that seemed fun. There were a million characters that we loved, and about half of them died, but almost all of the deaths helped Harry grow and the story develop. She made Voldemort who, in my eyes, is right up there with Emperor Palpatine and Sauron. She made us grow attached to the characters even moreso than Tolkien did, and each book had about 2 dozen connections to each of the other 6 books that you don't really understand or appreciate until you've read all of them.Honest Truth: The epilogue in Deathly Hallows isn't all that bad, and you'd whine if it wasn't there. And Dumbledore is straight.
#1. Thomas the Tank Engine and Friends
That's right. Above Harry Potter and Frodo Baggins, John Lennon and Chris Martin, James Bond and Kiera Knightley, Christmas songs, coconuts, and our entire country is Thomas the Tank Engine. This was the first part of pop culture that I ever got into and obsessed over. I had the diecast trains, the videos, and books. I had Thomas board games, Thomas puzzles, Thomas shirts, Thomas Christmas ornaments, Thomas cookies, and Thomas bedsheets. When my parents potty-trained me, I got Thomas toys as rewards for not crapping my pants. I was Thomas for for my 4th and 5th Halloweens. I had at least 2 nightmares about scary parts of the TV show as a little kid. Thomas was the original reason of why blue is my favorite color. I'm not sure if I loved Thomas because I loved trains, or if I loved trains because I loved Thomas, or both. But they definately went hand-in-hand. Thomas and Friends started out as a children's book series, The Railway series, written by the Rev. W. Awdry from 1945 to 1972. In 2000, my parents gave me Thomas the Tank Engine: Thee Complete Collection, which includes all 26 books written by Awdry. I crack it open every now and then to read about Thomas, Edward, Henry, Gordon, James, Percy, Toby, and the rest of them, and when I have a son, these will be his bedtime stories.Honest Truth: "Thomas the Tank Engine and Friends" was better than "Sesame Street", "Barney", "Reading Rainbow", and "Mister Roger's Neighborhood" combined. I will physically fight you over this fact of life.
32 comments:
As usual, loved your blog! I can honestly say I laughed out loud through most of it. Can't believe you're heading to London next month...I wonder if the city will ever be the same after you land there! Mom
I fundamentally disagree on the honest truth of 10, 3,2,1 and the second half of 4. Just saying.
That's because you're stupid.
Lol, kidding, of course. So then, what do you consider to be Coldplay's best CD? And why do you support Saruman taking over the Shire? And are you honestly telling me that you wouldn't whine if Deathly Hallows ended with just the last chapter? And you didn't mind the end of Holy Grail? And when/where can we arrange a hand-to-hand brawl over Thomas the Tank Engine?
No way. I'd say Parachutes and A Rush of Blood to the Head are both better than Viva la Vida.
Saruman taking over the shire resolves the final conflicts and solidifies the idea that no one is left untouched by that war, or any other. It also proves how much the hobbits have changed, and their new places in their old home. It also shows that the little guy can stand up against his oppressor and win. It's appropriate I think.
I'd whine about Deathly Hollows regardless because I didn't think it was a good book. I'm not a big fan of the later books really, but especially that one. I think I would have been OK just letting the ending go, because I think the epilogue was pointless and cheesy. It's less than I would have expected from her, though I understand the need for closure of the series on her part. You can't keep cranking out legend forever. Unless you're Raymond E. Feist that is. I also think that while Rowlings explaination of Dumbledore's sexuality makes sense, it's up to interpretation. Usually I'd say it's open for debate, but when the author says it, it's hard to argue.
I don't mind the end of the Holy Grail. I think it is good, and is consistent with the other works of Monty Python, in which, to some degree the style of the Holy Grail is an anomaly.
I'll defend Mr. Rogers and LeVar Burton any day. Just name the time and place.
Midnight. The docks.
I have to agree, I'll defend Mr. Rogers and LeVar Burton as well.
But the ending of LOTR was good and necessary. And Harry Potter could have ended with the last chapter and been fine. It leaves the future open to interpretation.
And Dumbledore is gay, get over it. Rowling said it and you can't really dispute the person who wrote the book and created the character.
Got a problem with it, I'll fight you on that too.
Done deal.
Oh and I'll fight you on Kiera Knightley. Because I can. And because you specifically mentioned me. And because you mentioned star wars I and that is one of your least favorite star wars.
Honest Truth: I win.
LOTR: Shire part was still obnoxious. It would be as if Jordan and I had a big, epic, 3-part showdown at the docks, and he won, and when he finally got back to his house all victorious and tired, an old man appears and kicks him in the shins.
Dumbledore: I mean that she just sort of said it because she could-granted, her word is law in this case, but it's still weird
Epilogue: Still leaves the future open for interpretation. And yeah, it's cheesy, that's obvious, but after all the crap that happens in the 7 books and all the people that die, I think Harry deserves a little cliched happy ending.
Kids Shows: Ok, even I will admit that Mr. Rogers and LeVar were awesome. That is very true. Thomas still beats Barney and Sesame Street and breaks even with Mr. Rogers and Reading Rainbow.
Kiera: That's true too about Star Wars Episode I. But she was only 14 in that movie. Her acting skills hadn't developed yet. ;)
Reading Rainbow sucked.
End of story.
And I'm going to beat you.
Ok, fine. Since Reading Rainbow sucked, Thomas WAS better than Reading Rainbow. :)
Yeah you pretty much contradicted yourself on that one Emily
Well yeah, I know.
But I just didn't like Reading Rainbow. I don't know, i thought it was lame.
But I liked LeVar Burton, I just didn't like the show probably because the music in the opening bothered me and I didnt' like the butterflies...
If I got past that, he was pretty cool.
But with Thomas, there was nothing to get past. He was just cool.
You had to get past the fact that he wasn't as cool as Mr. Rogers and Reading Rainbow. Take a look, it's in a book.
Jordan FTW
The best thing about Mr. Rogers was the trolley that zipped around the house. Unfortunately, one trolley isn't as good as dozens of trains with faces.
Nah, the best part was seeing how stuff happened.
Although I also enjoyed his little sweater vest/sneakers striptease. And him feeding the fish. I was always jealous of the random traffic light he had. Remember that? That was sweet. But I hate, hate, HATE the puppets. They were creepy looking.
Btw, Thomas never had creepy puppets. Just saying...
Mr. Rogers was awesome.
He showed you how things worked which was awesome.
And the neighborhood of Make-Believe was awesome.
The neighborhood of make-believe was frightening.
You're just intimidated by its awesomeness. It's ok.
Here's an idea for you two-
Rearrange the ten things I came up with in the order that they appear for your favorites, then make your OWN top ten list of things from england and put them as comments. :)
How about no.
You're boring.
Let's see here's my rearrangement of your things:
10. Greensleeves
9. Thomas the Tank Engine & Friends
8. Cold Play
7. The Beatles
6. Kiera Knightley
5. James Bond
4. Harry Potter
3. Lord of the Rings
2. Monty Python
1. USA
10. H.G. Wells
9. Pink Floyd
8. Oasis
7. The Beatles
6. J.K. Rowling
5. Phillip Pullman
4. J.R.R. Tolkien
3. Sean Connery
2. Monty Python
1. America
well... sean connery is scottish... but still, same island, if you need another, add the office to the end of the list
Well at least we put Bond in the same spot, lol. And way to be a patriotic, Monty Python die-hard. Very nice. And Sean Connery counts because he's Sean Connery.
So wait, do you like the Dark Materials trilogy better than Harry Potter? Or do you just think Pullman is a better author?
Eh, a little bit of both. I think that the early books of Harry Potter might have been better, but as a series I think His Dark Materials might have been better.
here's a news flash
this could be one of the last posts from houghton before london
hows that grab ya
see ya friday
Post a Comment